Lost in the Translation

Ok, so my daughter is taking phoned-in orders at a steak and burger delivery place. (Which by the way she will not let me take a picture of her in her official uniform.)

So she gets a call yesterday and the woman calling in an order in broken english wants "a hamburger with cheese"

So my daughter repeats the order back "a cheesburger"

"No no no" ... "I want hamburger with cheese on it" ... "not cheeseburger"

– ? – ? – ? –

Ok... so she got that instead. ... Glad my days of dealing with the public are over.
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Way Back

Let's play dress-up!

First of all let me say that I never do participate in blog organized activities. But I was looking for an opportunity to put this photo of me in my brown prom tux for a while and it just seems like today is the day.

Do not adjust your monitors... the tux is brown and the trim on the ruffle shirt is a matching brown. Sweet! The year was 1980 and the "Ralph Malph" helmet hair was ready for action. My lovely date, Benay, was stunning in her matching brownish prom dress. I have never been as dressed up since.

What A Country

Name one other place in America where you can buy a gross of bottle rockets AND a goat. My brother Tim (pictured here) has perhaps struck summertime gold by giving the consumer one-stop fireworks/goat roadside shopping experience... unavailable anywhere else that I'm aware of. Okay maybe in some remote Chinese provience high in the mountains... but really this is closer.

So if you're driving on Hwy 231/431 north of Huntsville, Alabama look for the signs. Stop in and say "hey" to my brother, Tim.... tell him Bart sent you. Ask for the "Blogger Discount" and he might throw in some roman candles.
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Spaghetti Cake

Laura was heating up some spaghetti for Larry & I last night and plopped it on a plate from the plastic bowl. It was great with the sauce by the way. Thanks, Laura!

Next week she's making chocolate pudding that looks like a lobster and then she'll make cheese grits in the shape of the Washington Monument.
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Happy Dad

Nothing quite says "I love you Dad!" like an extremely sharp kitchen knife and a cool cutting board.

I had hinted around that that is what I wanted and needed. They pull through every time. I love 'em!

Now I can cook just like Racheal Ray.
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Gold-Diggers and Long Lost Cousins Stay Away!

Ok... so I won the lottery while down in Florida. Not the big $9 million prize... but the $4 prize.

Me and my two buddies made a pact to split all of our winnings and win we did! After taxes I figure we each won 67¢ ... I'm no math wizard but that's pretty sweet right?

So I'm going to be heading back down to the coast to collect my share. I'll be back in 14 hours.
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Back From Vacatiooooooonnnn

The three amigos just returned from Destin and had a blast. Soaked up lots of sun and fried crab claws. Jealous? Get over it.




Laura, Larry and Bart... sporting our coolness








We stayed at the Sandestin Hilton and enjoyed our balcony view








I fell asleep one day by the pool and got some uneven burn lines but other than that the trip was a success.

Deliver De Letter... De Sooner De Better!

Snapped this photo yesterday on my way through Madison on Mill Road.

This guy wants his mail still delivered ... but just not a lot of heavy mail.

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Death Before Fashion Disaster #2

My 16year old daughter has her first job that she starts tomorrow. It requires a red cap and matching red shirt. She has to get pants and shoes today...

Me: ... What kind of pants do you need to get?

Daughter: ... They said Duckhead or something like it

Me: ... What color?

Daughter: ... navy blue only ... why do they want navy blue pants when their shirt colors are red, BLACK and yellow? Why not black pants?

Me: ... I have no idea

Me: ... What kind of shoes?

Daughter: ... black or white tennis shoes

Me: ... so you're getting black shoes?

Daughter: ... white shoes ... black shoes with navy blue pants?

Daughter: ... why would you get black shoes to go with navy blue pants?

Me: ... so the dirt won't show?

Daughter: ... Dad, stop talking now

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(Oops ... I did it again with the function over fashion logic.)

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I Ruined It ... Didn't I?

To give you a quick overview... I am a single dad ... not real handy in the kitchen (but making steps forward) Looks like I took a step back last night.

I mastered french toast a month ago but apparently I haven't conquered boiling water yet. I put my copper-bottomed Revereware empty on a hot burner and I got distracted. Came back and poured cold water in it and boy was that a mistake.

There was black powdered dust all over the stove top. Any harm in me still using this pan other than the fact that I uglied it up?